Upside down and backwards. As you are reading this, you might be wondering, "What is this person referring to? Upside and backwards? What is upside and backwards?" Upside and Backwards is how things in life I'd found truly are. All my life, I'd thought that things were supposed to be cheery, happy, and somewhat easy going. I was sorely wrong. Alcoholics, abusive people, bad financial times, and worse can happen even among the upper middle class and rich people. I should know. It happened in my upper middle class family. You name it, my family had it. Lol. But, despite all of this, I also learned, in life, that you've got to be strong.
And so, I kept that stubborne spirit of mine, as head strong as my abusive brother, but in for standing up for what was right in life, not to tear down myself and others. My brother and I were so similar, not just in hobbies, etc., but in our stubbornness. The only thing, then, that had divided us was a sense of morals (I had them. He didn't). And because of that, as I went along, as best I could as though nothing was wrong, writing poetry and drawing to help me through it and through his abuse and other behaviours, I still got to see some of the wonderful things in life that were not as they seemed-that who you thought would stay abusive would not (my brother stopped his abuse, owned up to it, apologized, truly, and never did it, again, He was not one to ever apologize. But he stopped physical and other abuses, completely, sought counseling for himself, apologised, and is on meds, now, etc.). And I'd learned that who you'd thought was your best friend and lover truly was not, that no matter how hard you try in life, ill health can still happen and prevent good things in life from occurring, and that those you thought would stand by your side, truly do not do so. Plus, that sometimes, the one with whom you could see yourself won't be with you, after all. Yep, that drop dead gorgeous, model perfect beauty of a man who won't have sex with you no matter how hard you might plea with him that it makes you think he is gay, but he claims he isn't [(gay)] (tear my heart out, now, ladies, to save me from the mental, emotional, and physical torment of this situation (lol). ;) My point is that nothing seemed normal-in my life, anyway, but seemed normal in everyone else' (normal? What that? Lol).
Anyway, I've learned that nothing rarely is as we might perceive, want, or might have dreamt it to be. When I'd realised this, life seemed a little less bright. But, I know that despite all of this, I also know that those you'd least expected to be there for you, truly are (such as my brother who recently stated to me about that if I want him by my side while I go for my treatment, which threw me off cus I'd never known him to ever be that supportive to me, nor to anyone else, before. That had actually made me cry out of gratefulness and being moved by that support from him). And I also now know that we (human beings) are to keep on living, some would say because of hope that things might change, or as a friend of mine once said, "I keep going because I just do. I just have to." So, what's your reason for continuing on in life? Whatever it is, I pray for you that it is all wonderful. But, even if it isn't, just know that some are going through something similar and that there is always someone out there who does understand, plus that there are people who will listen if you just want to talk or need someone's shoulder to cry on (including me). Upside and Backwards... Believe me, I understand. And I'm here for you.
April Morone
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Discrimination?? I don't think so!
Recently, I came across a couple of situations where discrimination was done, and wasn't of anything minor, neither. Apparently, a few insurance companies have been discriminating against people based on Gender differences (some people have had problems accessing insurance benefits who are transgender). So, naturally, I stepped in to help them by contacting the Transgender Law center (TLC) about this to see what they had to say about this, and what I had found about this made me mad. They said that insurance companies can get away with some of the discrimination while not being allowed to get away with discrimination against people who are transgender (TG) that I know is due to a loophole in how the insurance companies have their policies on what they will cover of medical surgeries and medical care to be done. Between that and other discrimination that I had come across other people discriminating against or judging and assuming things about people based on what some people have done that is bad, I became mad cus there is still discrimination, today, and there is so much of it, still-perhaps more so. I got mad. But, I let that anger fuel me to advocate more so than I ever had, before, in my life cus someone needs to stand up and fight against all this B.S. that is going on, today, in government and in the world. And when i heard about how gay marriage isn't being condoned, I grew even more mad, even more dishearted, and even more sad for the state of affairs of how it all is, today, of laws being passed and of other laws NOT being passed so as to assert rules and laws over what people can and cannot do in their personal and private lives that shouldn't be inacted, in my opinion, of that type of control, because whether or not gay (or BI) people get married isn't hurting anyone and is the right of all Gay (and Bi) people around the world-our god-given right-as to whom we want to marry. So what if I marry a man or a woman for whom I fall in love? Who would it be harming? I don't look down upon heterosexual people for marrying their opposite sex. Why should heterosexual lawmakers decide whether or not I get to marry a woman or a man? They might as well next tell me with whom I can have sex, or better yet, to tell me that I cannot masterbate, cus, well, that, same as marrying someone of my same sex, would prevent procreation. They have a biased concept of right and wrong, not a true concept of right and wrong. Sure, I cannot procreate with a woman as I am a woman, too, physically. But, I had a tubal ligation after the birth of my two beautiful children cus I was physically too high risk with those pregnancies and had had miscarriages at a few different points in my life when trying to conceive with my ex-husband before the birth of my two living children. So, that wouldn't matter, procreation-wise, if I still had sex with men cus I couldn't have children, anyway, anymore. Lawmakers (and doctors) say that using birth control for heterosexual couples can be a good idea to cut down on the population and to prevent unplanned pregnancies. But, at the same time, they then don't seem to condone people having, nor marrying same-sex partners, seeming out of what could possibly be an antiquated olde Christian belief about that people are to have sex to procreate (and only to procreate), and, there, sex isn't for pleasure, but only for procreation purposes. And so, we must all be with partners of the opposite sex to procreate. O.k., then, if I could have more kids and were ready for more kids, I would go for InVitro fertilisation, or cus am Bi, I'd just have sex with someone I love who'd be willing to help me become a parent, again. There. Procreation would be taken care of. But, if I am in love with a woman, I would be with that woman, regardless of what anyone says. Why? Because that is my human right. My body, opinions, thoughts, feelings, etc., my choice. It's my choice. No one else's.
On the subject of discrimination , I've also seen other forms of discrimination that have ben just as bad as this where rights have been taken away, and it disgusts me. This just shouldn't be happening. Homeless people being discriminated against when some really are trying to get back on their feet is just one of the types of discrimination that shouldn't be happening. I'd been homeless at one point in my life when my ex-husband had lost his job. But, we got back on our feet, and were okay, after that time. But we were judged, badly. I'd also seen other homeless people judged bad-so badly in fact, that, that when one women who was in a domestic violence situation tried reporting her situation, she was shunned away, and her partner than shot her, right where she was sitting in the very seat where I'd normally sit when i had the time to do so, at that homeless shelter in the Manna House homeless shelter, here, in Tampa, Florida. I'd been away, that day, on bed rest (doctor's orders), that the homeless shelter had to adhere to so that I wouldn't go back into preterm labour, too early in the pregnancy. So, they had me in the back in a safe, secure room, away from any disturbances that sometimes happened at the shelter so i could be stress free to rest my body. Anyway, what if I had been sitting out there, that day? Would she have sat next to me, and would I then have seen her get shot, instead of what had happened that day of having been told by staff when I'd heard the gunshot, to stay back and to not go outside to see what had happened cus she had been shot? And if so, would I have been accidentally shot if he had aimed, incorrectly, or if I had tried to go call police as soon as I had seen the commotion by him? She'd been shot. That had been the reality of it. Plain and simple. She'd been shot. He'd not wanted her to leave him, and shot her after he had left her, apparently. If someone to whom she had reported the domestic violence had only listened and then had helped her, she might have avoided death by his abuse. But, she was discriminated against because of her being homeless. And after having seen that, I had refused to let anyone know about the situation that happened by my ex-husband, while he and I were still together and still homeless, of him bringing his fist down upon me. I worried that I wouldn't be helped cus I, too, was in a domestic violence situation, and, like that other homeless woman who'd been shot, I, too, would have been possibly shunned away from being helped to safety because I was homeless.
Then, when in a group I created that I also manage with two other wonderful moderators, I came across discrimination, again. Another member of group made the assumption that all techies are like how some people have perceived Steve job-the founder of Apple, Inc., who'd recently passed away-to be of being negative and of only caring about money, and being snooty. O.k., so maybe Steve jobs might have been like that. I never personally knew him. But, I did know many other good techies who weren't like that of being greedy, rude, uncaring, etc, like they say Steve jobs was. I also know computers, used to work at at Dell, and know how to programme computers and know web programming. O.k., so,... just because I am kind of a techie, that doesn't automatically mean that I am the way that that person thought Steve jobs and all techies are like. Not all techies are like that. In fact, including me, there have been other techies in my poetry group who'd mentioned in one thread, a long time ago that they were techies. And they both were wonderful, bright, polite, and happy people who seemed to care about other people. They were even happier than me, and I am the one always giving people hugs to brighten their day and to give them comfort for any and all situations in support for them, online, and in person. That was such an incorrect assumption that he'd made of that all techies are that way. We aren't.
O.k., if you have made it this far in my very long blog post, kudos to you all. :) And I apologise for my blog post being this long. I truly do apologise about this. Anyway, the last discrimination I'd like to mention, here, is that of those who are not writers discriminating against those who are writers. What was said about writers was that we (writers) are lasy with no real sense of motivation to get a "real" job that has "real" income, and that we don't work hard at what we do. Um, have they seen my collection of poems that now amounts to about over 400 poems, my novel and the start of my other book, my blogs, my poetry group that is on two different sites? Do they also know how much revision goes into writing, and how that doing the revision process can, in and of itself, can take longer to do than to actually type our work? Do they understand how much time actually goes into that, plus into trying to market our books/works? While I never got that discrimination, I heard it being said by those who were discriminating against writers. Some of those who'd discriminated agianst writers, I'd not talked to. But, some, I had talked with to tell them that I am a writer. And when they asked to see some of my work, I showed them, plus told them that without writers, they wouldn't be reading the books they like, nor watching the news on t.v. because writers write not just books, but some writers write for the news. That discriminative bunch of people hadn't said anything after I'd told them those points. People just open their mouths and insert their foot in it, so to speak, when they discriminate. It just amases me the things people and th government say and do in discrimination of others. Discrimination? Not if I help it! That's my two cents for the day. What;s yours? Please feel free to comment your opinions about this subject.
On the subject of discrimination , I've also seen other forms of discrimination that have ben just as bad as this where rights have been taken away, and it disgusts me. This just shouldn't be happening. Homeless people being discriminated against when some really are trying to get back on their feet is just one of the types of discrimination that shouldn't be happening. I'd been homeless at one point in my life when my ex-husband had lost his job. But, we got back on our feet, and were okay, after that time. But we were judged, badly. I'd also seen other homeless people judged bad-so badly in fact, that, that when one women who was in a domestic violence situation tried reporting her situation, she was shunned away, and her partner than shot her, right where she was sitting in the very seat where I'd normally sit when i had the time to do so, at that homeless shelter in the Manna House homeless shelter, here, in Tampa, Florida. I'd been away, that day, on bed rest (doctor's orders), that the homeless shelter had to adhere to so that I wouldn't go back into preterm labour, too early in the pregnancy. So, they had me in the back in a safe, secure room, away from any disturbances that sometimes happened at the shelter so i could be stress free to rest my body. Anyway, what if I had been sitting out there, that day? Would she have sat next to me, and would I then have seen her get shot, instead of what had happened that day of having been told by staff when I'd heard the gunshot, to stay back and to not go outside to see what had happened cus she had been shot? And if so, would I have been accidentally shot if he had aimed, incorrectly, or if I had tried to go call police as soon as I had seen the commotion by him? She'd been shot. That had been the reality of it. Plain and simple. She'd been shot. He'd not wanted her to leave him, and shot her after he had left her, apparently. If someone to whom she had reported the domestic violence had only listened and then had helped her, she might have avoided death by his abuse. But, she was discriminated against because of her being homeless. And after having seen that, I had refused to let anyone know about the situation that happened by my ex-husband, while he and I were still together and still homeless, of him bringing his fist down upon me. I worried that I wouldn't be helped cus I, too, was in a domestic violence situation, and, like that other homeless woman who'd been shot, I, too, would have been possibly shunned away from being helped to safety because I was homeless.
Then, when in a group I created that I also manage with two other wonderful moderators, I came across discrimination, again. Another member of group made the assumption that all techies are like how some people have perceived Steve job-the founder of Apple, Inc., who'd recently passed away-to be of being negative and of only caring about money, and being snooty. O.k., so maybe Steve jobs might have been like that. I never personally knew him. But, I did know many other good techies who weren't like that of being greedy, rude, uncaring, etc, like they say Steve jobs was. I also know computers, used to work at at Dell, and know how to programme computers and know web programming. O.k., so,... just because I am kind of a techie, that doesn't automatically mean that I am the way that that person thought Steve jobs and all techies are like. Not all techies are like that. In fact, including me, there have been other techies in my poetry group who'd mentioned in one thread, a long time ago that they were techies. And they both were wonderful, bright, polite, and happy people who seemed to care about other people. They were even happier than me, and I am the one always giving people hugs to brighten their day and to give them comfort for any and all situations in support for them, online, and in person. That was such an incorrect assumption that he'd made of that all techies are that way. We aren't.
O.k., if you have made it this far in my very long blog post, kudos to you all. :) And I apologise for my blog post being this long. I truly do apologise about this. Anyway, the last discrimination I'd like to mention, here, is that of those who are not writers discriminating against those who are writers. What was said about writers was that we (writers) are lasy with no real sense of motivation to get a "real" job that has "real" income, and that we don't work hard at what we do. Um, have they seen my collection of poems that now amounts to about over 400 poems, my novel and the start of my other book, my blogs, my poetry group that is on two different sites? Do they also know how much revision goes into writing, and how that doing the revision process can, in and of itself, can take longer to do than to actually type our work? Do they understand how much time actually goes into that, plus into trying to market our books/works? While I never got that discrimination, I heard it being said by those who were discriminating against writers. Some of those who'd discriminated agianst writers, I'd not talked to. But, some, I had talked with to tell them that I am a writer. And when they asked to see some of my work, I showed them, plus told them that without writers, they wouldn't be reading the books they like, nor watching the news on t.v. because writers write not just books, but some writers write for the news. That discriminative bunch of people hadn't said anything after I'd told them those points. People just open their mouths and insert their foot in it, so to speak, when they discriminate. It just amases me the things people and th government say and do in discrimination of others. Discrimination? Not if I help it! That's my two cents for the day. What;s yours? Please feel free to comment your opinions about this subject.
Saturday, July 16, 2011
The Power of Friendship
The power of friendship... I think on this, happily, as I sit here, relaxing. Freinds. How I am grateful them and for their kindness and caring, and for their humour that so helps, espcially during some difficult times. Friendship... This is so special. Relationshups and partners may come and go. but friends-truefriends-stay. And I remember how I had made bad friends-friends who really weren't true friends-during bad times in my life. But, I'd made true friends at points in my life throughout my life, and am so thankful and grateful for this and foe them all. So, my dear, kind spirits, thank you. Thank you for being here, for being you, and for supporting me through it all. And most importantly, thank you for letting me also return the favour and be here for you all, as well. A true and equal friendship. It took me a long time to realise what truly is important in life. but, I realise it, now, fully. And friends and friendship are what are truly important. And I am glad, honoured, and proud to be a friend to you all, as well. Thank you (Ty).
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
Poetry Community
I'd created a poetry community that is wonderful and is really coming into its own. I'd never expected it to grow this much, but am so happy that it has. I'd built it for writers to read, comment on, and to post poems, prose, and, later, songs, and for them to interact with each other about writing and about the subjects of the pieces, as well as feel at home in doing so, and to have their voices heard about whatever they wanted to express in their pieces as well as in comments with each other, too. And what I ended up seeing, for the most part, has been very wonderful interactions with its members, and very wonderful members, as well. This poetry community that was built, called 'Poetry Corner,' is my pride and joy-sort of like a mother feels for her child-cus it is my group I'd created that sort of took off and grew and seems to be going along, wonderfully. I can truly say that I am happy to have this group and its members a part of this group. Its members truly are kindred souls.
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Life's Surprising Changes/Irony
I've removed the previous blog post cus it seemed so negative. I didn't want that effect. Hugs, all.
Life's Surprises
"Life's Surprises" blog is about surprising subjects, situations, or things. And each blog post I post will have a different surprising subject within/of it.
Annika Doe (April Morone)
Annika Doe (April Morone)
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